So, yours was an overachieving perfectionist as well? [ There's nothing but warmth in her words, however. Her smile sincere despite the slight wrinkles at the corners of her eyes and mouth brought on by an emotional strain she can't fully conceal. The shadow cast by Cassandra may have been long, but she never felt less than for standing in it. She doubted anyone felt that way when they were sure they were in the presence of greatness. If Cassandra were here, they wouldn't be worrying about how to make it through with fewer supplies. She would have already created and enacted a plan and the incident with the Ferry would have been stopped before it even began. Even at eighteen, she was that great a leader.
Understanding causes her features to slacken, Allie cringing this time for her own stupidity and she's beginning to wonder if this friendship might have been easier if they agreed never to meet in person. ]
Technically I think I just inadvertently invited myself into your room, so? I'm firmly in the negative.
[ They're both so smooth. ]
Yes. [ So much yes on the starting again.
It's his easy way of being able to roll with it that has any unease at her own awkwardness melting away. Allie smiling in spite of herself as he 'starts again' and despite the way she pulls her sleeves over the heels of her palms like a little kid trying to lose herself in her sweater? It's hard to imagine she's anything but charmed with the way her smile widens the more he speaks...
and yet. ]
Mets? [ Her nose wrinkling again. ] If you'd said Yankees not only would you have earned an immediate thumbs down but we never could have spoken again, so I guess it could have been worse - but still. I might have to start calling you Parker in protest.
[ Sure. Let's talk about Baseball. And when they're done with that they can move onto the weather! Whatever saves her from having to either agree with his Aunt's assessment of him or lie. ]
I—. [ he starts to reply before he's had chance to think about his answer. it's complicated isn't really an answer; it definitely isn't an answer anyone normally gives to questions like that (do they?). "we actually only met for the first time fairly recently, I don't know" is an answer, but that's just a longer version of 'it's complicated.' ] Yeah, I guess she is. [ a breath of a pause, and he's aware, quite suddenly, of the slight edge of evasiveness (nothing new for him), but— ]
She's followed in our parents' footsteps, [ he admits, after a moment. it's accompanied by a flash of hesitation, like he's about to leave it there, but then— past tense, allie had stuck with past tense for her sister. there's an honesty in that, and he doesn't miss the way that allie's expression tightens just a little bit. so— ]
We didn't know them. We didn't know each other until recently, but she's— [ a quirk of his lips; it's a warm smile, with genuine fondness. the way that he says that they didn't know them is just a statement of fact, like it was that long ago that it's stopped bothering him. for as much as he can, he's moved on from the hurt and the anger and the confusion — he'd had ben and may, and for whatever else, he'd also had a degree of closure. ] —she's really great, you know? And she's managed to avoid becoming a national disgrace, so there's that.
—I think I'm a pretty low bar, in all honesty.
[ but then allie mentions the yankees and peter pulls a face. ] —If we're sticking with the theory that this is purgatory, supporting the Yankees would definitely be the sin that'd get me sent here. I don't know if I could live with myself, let alone... My uncle would've been so disappointed. Disgusted, even. I think I'd've been disowned.
[ none of that. none of that would have actually happened, but that doesn't mean he's not going to pass up an opportunity to air his offence at the mere thought of being a yankees fan. at the thought of being called parker, though, he laughs. ]
Oh, man, all of my exes call me 'Parker' when they're annoyed with me, or when I'm spacing out and not really... [ 'listening' is what the look of sheepishness says. mj had gotten pretty good at recognising the difference between generic 'peter has his mind elsewhere' and the slightly more-frequent 'oh, great, that look of distraction is thanks to his spidey-sense'. one would be accompanied by his full name, the other just his surname. it'd taken him a while to cotton on to, and he's still not sure he always notices, because he's pretty sure there's occasionally a 'peter' thrown in for good measure.
maybe it'd mostly been when things had been difficult between them? ] I'd say you'd be in good company calling me that, but that sounds a little weird, so I'll go with: you'll be in frequently exasperated, but I totally get why company.
[ A million questions all fight for dominance in her head but she knows better than to give them voice. There were just some things you didn't ask about, instead allowing them to come up when the other person was ready. Perhaps there was also the knowledge that in asking questions, she'd be opening herself up to the same and as much as Allie liked Peter already? There were just some subjects she'd avoided, for even longer than she'd been here.
Her mouth opens, Allie immediately wanting to argue with him when he slips into self-deprecation. The words dancing on the tip of her tongue before she can smother them by pressing her lips together. She didn't know him well enough to be able to argue that he was wrong but she knows her own choices well enough to know one thing for certain. ]
I don't think anyone would look great if we judged them by their worst mistakes. [ Maybe he was, as he said, a national disgrace but she didn't need to talk to him for too long to see he was a good person. The kind of person who actually spoke well of ex-girlfriends, something she could honestly say she'd ever encountered before. ]
You mean, throwing me in with your exes before you even know my last name? [ The widening of her smile and playful tone hopefully assuring him that she's teasing. ] What do you prefer to be called?
[ the comment about judging people by their worst mistakes earns a startled glance but no comment — he knows he's his own worst critic when it comes to those, and he knows that he's going to spending a long time making up for it (them). he knows he's done good, he knows he's helped people, but he also knows that he's probably never going to do enough to feel like it balances out.
(he's aware, too, that therapy would probably be great, but who can afford that? who has the time? and knowing his luck, it'd end up being with mysterio again.) ]
Sure. [ he agrees after a moment, expression shifting into brief discomfort. he holds up a hand and— ] Listen, in the interest of transparency, I don't think national disgrace is actually a judgement call on my character. Honestly, all else being equal, it's kind of an achievement — you know, kid from Queens earns enough recognition to have a very dramatic fall from grace? [ but it's not exactly overachieving perfectionism, and there'd been a very real reason may had chewed him out when he'd gone to visit her post-fact. ] How many people can say that? And it actually did me a favour, but it's a really long, complicated story and I like to take refuge in audacity, so I'll leave the rest to your imagination. [ beat. ] But for what it's worth, someone very close to me found it hilarious, so it's definitely not as bad or as low as you're imagining.
[ the question of what he likes to be called shuts him up, and the momentary blank expression reflects the fact that he has never, not once, been ask that. he opens his mouth, pauses, and then laughs. ] I feel like I should have a wittier answer than 'Peter', but it is my name, so — that.
—Are you saying knowing your first name and where you live isn't enough? [ equally playful, though it's followed by a moment of pointed, deliberate consideration and he eyes her appraisingly, just for a second. ] The other option was comparing you to that boss I mentioned, which is insulting on a level I can't even begin to put into words, so unless you're doing a really good job of hiding a moustache and you're wearing a wig to obscure a hairstyle that's definitely been inspired by the cutting-edge development of yard brooms over the last, I don't know, thirty years, it seemed like the safer bet.
[ Even if he doesn't see it as that big a deal, it still strikes her as - interesting, that it would be one of the first things he tells her about himself. It almost makes her wonder if he's intentionally trying to lower her possible expectations of him, or if he's simply trying to normalize it but putting it out there like it's no big deal. ]
So... basically you're trying to tell me you've achieved meme level infamy. [ Managing a wry, half-grin as she makes the choice to not push the subject further. Not that it will stop her from calling him out if she feels he's slipping into self-deprecation but she's not so oblivious that she doesn't catch that flicker of discomfort. This wasn't the hill she was going to die on. Not today, anyway.
A bubble of laughter rises up, Allie's fingers becoming tangled in her long curling hair as she tries to comb through the length. ]
I only wish this were a wig. [ Always the way. People with straight hair envy curls, while those who have them would kill to not. ] I think I'll stick with Peter. [ Her grin widening a touch. ] All things being equal.
On and off, [ peter admits with a short laugh. to say the last year or so had been wild would be an understatement, from horizon labs to parker industries, to everything after and now this. he'd take sitting through being considered local threat and menace as peter parker and spider-man countless times over if it meant not being stuck in a bizarro pocket dimension. ] Infamous enough for my elderly downstairs neighbor to know me for my escapades, but not so infamous she doesn't want to use me for my frankly spectacular grocery-carrying skills. [ of course, it wasn't that simple and neither was marnie — even if she definitely did use and abuse him for nefarious, elevator-avoiding means.
he eyes her hair when she speaks again, and he looks somewhere between surprised and confused — as far as hair goes, it seems like perfectly fine hair. nice, even, in his totally unqualified opinion. ] —Really? [ breath of a pause; eyes her, then her hair again, and then he lifts a shoulder, the corners of his lips quirking. ] I mean, I'm not a professional, so I can only speak aesthetically, but your hair is — well, it doesn't look like a broom, so that's got to be a plus, right?
[ a breath out. ] —Okay, great, we've established that we're going to call each other by our given names, and not to bring this back to awkward non-invitations, but standing in a doorway isn't quite my idea of a fun evening, so did you want tea? I won't be offended if you say no, I promise. [ his face scrunches up a little and he glances up towards the ceiling; small talk has never been a strong point of his. rambling? yes, but only when he has a topic of conversation — or when he wants to avoid an entirely different topic of conversation. ] I feel like we kind of got a bit distracted with the topic at hand earlier, and I'm still interested in hearing your thoughts on [ he gestures vaguely with a hand: "everything", in how they can have more structure.
even if it's going to be okay for now, what she'd said about things changing fast has stuck with him; and there's a flicker of hesitation before he adds: ] My aunt used to help run a homeless shelter. I know you've said about how bad it can get, but people in rough places can be good too, you know? More kind than they have any right to be.
spoil away always <3
Understanding causes her features to slacken, Allie cringing this time for her own stupidity and she's beginning to wonder if this friendship might have been easier if they agreed never to meet in person. ]
Technically I think I just inadvertently invited myself into your room, so? I'm firmly in the negative.
[ They're both so smooth. ]
Yes. [ So much yes on the starting again.
It's his easy way of being able to roll with it that has any unease at her own awkwardness melting away. Allie smiling in spite of herself as he 'starts again' and despite the way she pulls her sleeves over the heels of her palms like a little kid trying to lose herself in her sweater? It's hard to imagine she's anything but charmed with the way her smile widens the more he speaks...
and yet. ]
Mets? [ Her nose wrinkling again. ] If you'd said Yankees not only would you have earned an immediate thumbs down but we never could have spoken again, so I guess it could have been worse - but still. I might have to start calling you Parker in protest.
[ Sure. Let's talk about Baseball. And when they're done with that they can move onto the weather! Whatever saves her from having to either agree with his Aunt's assessment of him or lie. ]
no subject
She's followed in our parents' footsteps, [ he admits, after a moment. it's accompanied by a flash of hesitation, like he's about to leave it there, but then— past tense, allie had stuck with past tense for her sister. there's an honesty in that, and he doesn't miss the way that allie's expression tightens just a little bit. so— ]
We didn't know them. We didn't know each other until recently, but she's— [ a quirk of his lips; it's a warm smile, with genuine fondness. the way that he says that they didn't know them is just a statement of fact, like it was that long ago that it's stopped bothering him. for as much as he can, he's moved on from the hurt and the anger and the confusion — he'd had ben and may, and for whatever else, he'd also had a degree of closure. ] —she's really great, you know? And she's managed to avoid becoming a national disgrace, so there's that.
—I think I'm a pretty low bar, in all honesty.
[ but then allie mentions the yankees and peter pulls a face. ] —If we're sticking with the theory that this is purgatory, supporting the Yankees would definitely be the sin that'd get me sent here. I don't know if I could live with myself, let alone... My uncle would've been so disappointed. Disgusted, even. I think I'd've been disowned.
[ none of that. none of that would have actually happened, but that doesn't mean he's not going to pass up an opportunity to air his offence at the mere thought of being a yankees fan. at the thought of being called parker, though, he laughs. ]
Oh, man, all of my exes call me 'Parker' when they're annoyed with me, or when I'm spacing out and not really... [ 'listening' is what the look of sheepishness says. mj had gotten pretty good at recognising the difference between generic 'peter has his mind elsewhere' and the slightly more-frequent 'oh, great, that look of distraction is thanks to his spidey-sense'. one would be accompanied by his full name, the other just his surname. it'd taken him a while to cotton on to, and he's still not sure he always notices, because he's pretty sure there's occasionally a 'peter' thrown in for good measure.
maybe it'd mostly been when things had been difficult between them? ] I'd say you'd be in good company calling me that, but that sounds a little weird, so I'll go with: you'll be in frequently exasperated, but I totally get why company.
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Her mouth opens, Allie immediately wanting to argue with him when he slips into self-deprecation. The words dancing on the tip of her tongue before she can smother them by pressing her lips together. She didn't know him well enough to be able to argue that he was wrong but she knows her own choices well enough to know one thing for certain. ]
I don't think anyone would look great if we judged them by their worst mistakes. [ Maybe he was, as he said, a national disgrace but she didn't need to talk to him for too long to see he was a good person. The kind of person who actually spoke well of ex-girlfriends, something she could honestly say she'd ever encountered before. ]
You mean, throwing me in with your exes before you even know my last name? [ The widening of her smile and playful tone hopefully assuring him that she's teasing. ] What do you prefer to be called?
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(he's aware, too, that therapy would probably be great, but who can afford that? who has the time? and knowing his luck, it'd end up being with mysterio again.) ]
Sure. [ he agrees after a moment, expression shifting into brief discomfort. he holds up a hand and— ] Listen, in the interest of transparency, I don't think national disgrace is actually a judgement call on my character. Honestly, all else being equal, it's kind of an achievement — you know, kid from Queens earns enough recognition to have a very dramatic fall from grace? [ but it's not exactly overachieving perfectionism, and there'd been a very real reason may had chewed him out when he'd gone to visit her post-fact. ] How many people can say that? And it actually did me a favour, but it's a really long, complicated story and I like to take refuge in audacity, so I'll leave the rest to your imagination. [ beat. ] But for what it's worth, someone very close to me found it hilarious, so it's definitely not as bad or as low as you're imagining.
[ the question of what he likes to be called shuts him up, and the momentary blank expression reflects the fact that he has never, not once, been ask that. he opens his mouth, pauses, and then laughs. ] I feel like I should have a wittier answer than 'Peter', but it is my name, so — that.
—Are you saying knowing your first name and where you live isn't enough? [ equally playful, though it's followed by a moment of pointed, deliberate consideration and he eyes her appraisingly, just for a second. ] The other option was comparing you to that boss I mentioned, which is insulting on a level I can't even begin to put into words, so unless you're doing a really good job of hiding a moustache and you're wearing a wig to obscure a hairstyle that's definitely been inspired by the cutting-edge development of yard brooms over the last, I don't know, thirty years, it seemed like the safer bet.
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So... basically you're trying to tell me you've achieved meme level infamy. [ Managing a wry, half-grin as she makes the choice to not push the subject further. Not that it will stop her from calling him out if she feels he's slipping into self-deprecation but she's not so oblivious that she doesn't catch that flicker of discomfort. This wasn't the hill she was going to die on. Not today, anyway.
A bubble of laughter rises up, Allie's fingers becoming tangled in her long curling hair as she tries to comb through the length. ]
I only wish this were a wig. [ Always the way. People with straight hair envy curls, while those who have them would kill to not. ] I think I'll stick with Peter. [ Her grin widening a touch. ] All things being equal.
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he eyes her hair when she speaks again, and he looks somewhere between surprised and confused — as far as hair goes, it seems like perfectly fine hair. nice, even, in his totally unqualified opinion. ] —Really? [ breath of a pause; eyes her, then her hair again, and then he lifts a shoulder, the corners of his lips quirking. ] I mean, I'm not a professional, so I can only speak aesthetically, but your hair is — well, it doesn't look like a broom, so that's got to be a plus, right?
[ a breath out. ] —Okay, great, we've established that we're going to call each other by our given names, and not to bring this back to awkward non-invitations, but standing in a doorway isn't quite my idea of a fun evening, so did you want tea? I won't be offended if you say no, I promise. [ his face scrunches up a little and he glances up towards the ceiling; small talk has never been a strong point of his. rambling? yes, but only when he has a topic of conversation — or when he wants to avoid an entirely different topic of conversation. ] I feel like we kind of got a bit distracted with the topic at hand earlier, and I'm still interested in hearing your thoughts on [ he gestures vaguely with a hand: "everything", in how they can have more structure.
even if it's going to be okay for now, what she'd said about things changing fast has stuck with him; and there's a flicker of hesitation before he adds: ] My aunt used to help run a homeless shelter. I know you've said about how bad it can get, but people in rough places can be good too, you know? More kind than they have any right to be.